2013-05-20

80's Prom Pictures, Totally Tubular


Prom blog by You're My Favorite Today inspired me to look for my rad 80's prom pictures. They crack me UP. 

These are the pictures I talk about in my prom blog post called “Prom-a Drama.” < -- click those words to be brought to that post if you haven’t seen it. It's kind of funny and tells the back story. 

We’ll wait.

Okay, now that you know the back story, here are the pics. FYI: I heart the 80's. Mayhap you, like totally had to be there, dude. Try listening to 80's big hair band sensation Poison while you look at these. Here, click the link below, read while this song plays. It'll set the mood.

I found one without any ad. You're welcome. 

In my defense, it was the 80’s, I was 16 and 17 in these pictures, and my sisters weren’t living at home to help me and my mom was.......well, a truck driver at one point in her life and she kept that “look” throughout her life.

The quality of the pictures is bad, scanner down, I took a picture of the pictures with my phone. Once again, bask in my hi-tech glory! If there is not already an award for "Worst Blogger Ever" someone may just make it up for me. 

This is my Senior Prom. The back of my hair is tied into a scrap of ribbon from a Christmas present, held underneath with a bobby pin. That was a trick my oldest sister taught me and the ONLY trick I knew on fancy hairdo’s. 


"This is like, totally gnarly."
"No duh."
Mullet? Yeah, it was like, the 80’s, dude. Totally. Just remember that if these styles make you want to like, gag yourself with like, a spoon. Even my DRESS is a righteous mulletBusiness in the front, party in the back! Same as my boyfriend's tux tails.

I think everyone got tux tails then. Do they still? I wouldn't know, my son didn't go to his Junior or Senior prom. Most people opt OUT for tails at weddings these days.

That thing on my right leg, that makes me look like a battered woman? Is a velvet champagne glass with rhinestones in the bubbles, attached to the panty hose. People loved evil panty hose in the 80s, so much they made them in white and blue and red, and people CHOSE to wear them. That's right, even in their own FREE TIME, not just to work and not just as part of an assigned uniform.

I found them at a store that was only open for about a year, they specialized in special occasion hose, you could get WORDS put on them for an extra charge. The dress was from some wedding I don't remember, and is also the same dress in the phone below of my Junior homecoming, and probably in 87 of my family's wedding photos. 

This dress came with the shoes! Uh maw GAWD, the shoooeess! In the 80's for weddings, people would always have lace shoes DYED to match the color of dresses and if it was the first (or even the sixth) time you wore those damn things, the ink would bleed onto your panty hose. It would slowly bleed up your panty hosed leg, and your feet would look bruised and battered for weeks. 

It was a simpler time, regular everyday people didn't have cell phones or the internet, or talk about condoms openly. Explains a lot, doesn't it? Sorry about that burning sensation when you pee. 

This one is my Junior prom, as explained in the prom post, the guy I was dating was down state or at state, or regionals or whatever. This is my Junior year BFF and her brother, with a killer fully-loaded mullet and 80's porn-stach. I'm wearing the dress I wore to be a bridesmaid in my oldest sister's wedding. Bolero jackets were hot.

"This backdrop is radical."
"I'm so sure."
"Psyyyych!"

p.s. I thought the city landscape background picture was SOOO BODACIOUS!

This next one.....Ugh. My Junior Homecoming. Is it just me? This picture gives me the heebs decades later. 

"Dude, like bag your gnarly face."
"Eat my shorts!"
I do apologize if this Grody to the Max image haunts your dreams. What is seen can't be unseen. I've learned you can't gouge out you're mind's eye. 

The creepy clowns in the background, I mean, what the hell kind of theme was it? Circus? For a high school homecoming. Good job, Dance Committee. Or whoever makes these decisions. 

I look like a ghost, and my date looks like a pedophile. I decided at the last minute to go with this....person let's just say, (because I feel like someone on my Facebook page might still be in touch with him in whatever minimum-security prison he currently resides,) to homecoming my junior year. He is the winner that showed up late, with a HICKEY on his neck from someone else. We were not dating, but still. A class act.

I didn't know from makeup in high school. I still don't. I was so skinny, but I probably thought I was chubby or something. Because high school.

Fun Fact: My sister and I saw this guy years later at a bar in our home town and she was IMMEDIATELY creeped out. She made us bring our drinks to the bathroom with us so he didn’t try to put something in them! That is a good practice at bars if you’re not with a group you know, as gross as it may seem to bring your drink into the bathroom it’s better than waking up in a bathtub full of ice or something.

So here they are. 

Do you still have your prom pictures? Funny old wedding photos? Awkward Family Photos? Anything funny or interesting to report?? I love 90's, 80's and before that style. I'd love to see yours if you have them! 

Email any you have, or think are funny to comfytown@gmail.com 

27 comments:

  1. Those are absolutely glorious. Mine are at my parents' house, but equally as bad. Mine were 90s pictures, aka the frosted bowl cut. Let us never speak of this picture again...

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    1. Ah, the 90's. Not quite as embarrassing as the 80's or the queen of all embarrassing decades, the 70s, but they had their moments! I'm sure every single one of your readers would love to see those photos!

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  2. If there's one style I hope never makes a comeback, it's the mullet. Though they wouldn't have been too much of an issue here in the tropics, back in the 80's... But now, thanks to the internet making everything so connected... *shudders*

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  3. Ha! I kind of hope they DO come back. They're funny to me. I live near Chicago and one of our baseball teams The White Sox has Mullet Night at the stadium. They did a few years ago anyway. I should check if that still happens. Good people watching!

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    1. I checked and YES, Mullet Night is ON for 2013 at Sox Park. It is June 28, 2013. Sports Fans, here is a link to Stub Hub if you want to buy tickets to that game. It's also a Fireworks Night.
      http://www.stubhub.com/chicago-white-sox-tickets/white-sox-vs-indians-6-28-2013-4169827/
      I used to love Elvis Night, it's every August, usually the first Friday game in August) but there are fewer Elvi every year. Now we take our 3 yr old to Star Wars night for photo op's.

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  4. I couldn't see the mullets for the big bangs in the front got in the way. :) :) :)

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    1. Mall Wall brought to you by Aqua Net!

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  5. You are a cutie, and I TOTALLY remember those applique hose! Bahaha! I wrote a bad prom experience post on The Sadder But Wiser Girl on St Patricks Day, pics and all! Hilarious! I had the full Cinderella dress, only the top was plaid, and the bottom was black..guess I was trying to rock bad a#@ Cinderella or something, plus big poufy hair, and bows on the shoes that matched the plaid!

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  6. Here is the Link, go check out the pics! Hee-Lar-IOUS! 1992...eek, needless to say this was the year sequins were the "it" thing to wear! Hah! Hope you have a good laugh!

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  7. Crap I forgot it again! Duh! http://sadderbutwiser.wordpress.com/2013/03/17/st-patricks-day-and-the-prom-date-snatcher/

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    1. Uh maw GAWD! Your hair is AMAZING! A plaid prom dress, SO COOL! I wore a shit-ton of plaid in the 90's, loved every minute of it! I still heart plaid. And thin little stripey stuff, don't care what goes in and out, I'll always love those.
      THANK YOU for sharing. You goody two-shoes, you.

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  8. Oh, the 1980s were ALL about mullets. At least here in Canada, where we called mullets "hockey hair." That was the era when hockey helmets became standard equipment. Players had to cut their hair short on the top and sides so the helmets would fit. But long hair was fine flowing out of the bottom of the hockey helmet. Therefore . . . "hockey hair."

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    1. I heard people call it hockey hair too, or a 7 b/c it's shaped like the number 7.

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  9. I love the fancy hose... and I had the shoes that were dyed to match my dress too! The mullets are splendid (including the mullet dress)! Totally rad!

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    1. hahaha thanks. I hope your dyed-to-match shoes didn't bleed up your legs too badly :)
      The fashion trend I am most grateful is over? Is the wearing of panty hose. EVIL.

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  10. Okay, I TOTALLY commented here the other day and now I check back and it isn't here!! Must've been computer error, not user.
    ANYway, what I said THEN was OH MY GOD you BITCHIN' BABE. These dresses and hair styles are like GNARLY.
    And oh, the mullets! And the 'stache! DYING. You need to send one of these (take your pick) into Ellen!!

    Btw - where's the mall wall??

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    1. In the first pic the bangs are kind of high up there but you don't notice b/c the whole thing is a mess! They were usually higher, my friend turned me on this GLUE-LIKE hairspray called Avec, (means "with" in French ??) Anyway, this crap made Aqua Net look like an all natural supplement! Maybe I was out of that crap for my prom? If you read the post called "Prom-a Drama" I spent all of like TEN MINUTES getting ready for this senior prom. Because tomboy, yo.
      p.s. I'm sure you DID comment on here and either it's waiting in the "Awaiting Moderation" section, which I never check because WHY DO I SUCK? ooooorrrrr I accidentally deleted it, which I totally have done before! I'm an idiot and I do this on the fly w/2 little kids running around yelling, and my brain is broken from years of sleep deprivation and weird pills in my former life. I have NO short term memory. What were we just talking about??

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  11. Haha. Mullets. In the 90s girls wore baggy pants and big tshirts. it wasn't any better. Are there any decades that don't cringe when they see their style choices?

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    1. Hi there, welcome! I feel like the 90s weren't that bad. But maybe b/c I'm still stuck in that decade. I still love plaid. And Nirvana.

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  12. Fear the mullet!

    OMG - these pics are too funny. I look so bad in my prom picture. I hope none of these styles ever come back! What were we thinking back then?

    Totally tubular!

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    1. I feel REALLY bad for people who went to prom, or got married in the 70s. Man-fro's, bell bottoms, Farrah Fawcett hair and blue eye shadow, ugh.

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  13. A velvet champagne glass with rhinestones as bubbles?! I'm CRYING! And NO ONE wears tux tails. I didn't think anyone ever did that.

    You do know how to rock a good hairstyle though. Thanks for the tips. I know just what to do to my hair for work tomorrow. ;-)

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    1. No prob, Bob. I hope your hair isn't like mine, which breaks off into a gazillion pieces, so for an up-do? I need an ENTIRE package of bobby pins by the end of the night. Do they still have light purple Aqua Net? That crap was like deck sealer.

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  14. Oh my gerd...the brother with the porn stach is exactly how I picture every guy from the 80's. Could have been one of my four brothers. I wondered about the hose. (that sentence made me laugh) I thought maybe you had a cool diamond/triangular tattoo.

    Poison played such a huge role in my growing up...Brett Michaels, I still love him a little.

    I love everything about this post and the 80's.

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    1. It's not far off!
      I heart the 80's too, even more now.
      Ever watch The Goldbergs? TV show based on the 80's.
      It's RADICAL.

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  15. I want to totally fuck your 80's self.

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