2013-10-27

Down The Rabbit Nasal-Cavity Hole

Here in the Midwest, everyone knows about the change-of-seasons Battle of the Boogers. The weather changes quickly, temps go up and down more than people in a Robin Thicke video. Pretty much everyone gets sick. 

You know it's coming, you try to take care, maybe vitamins, eat gross things like yogurt, because probiotics. But germs, like Gloria Estefan says about The Rhythm, they're gonna get ya. 

My kids usually only get sick for about a day and then they're magically fine. I, on the other hand, thanks to things like asthma, allergies, hypothyroid, the "itis" (being a lazy slob,) I take a little longer and once in awhile I really have a long uphill struggle. 

When I’m Sick, By Day

Day One

Me: “I’m getting the sniffles, better arm myself with soup, citrus…” and other healthy, natural foods and tinctures. 

from sciencebasedpharmacy.wordpress.com
Day Two

“It’s getting worse, I should get some Airborne with Zinc and echinacea.

 Antibiotics are the devil. I can fight this!”

I make chicken soup, drink as many liquids as my time, schedule and bladder permit. I eat plenty of oranges, other citrus and red peppers for Vitamin C.

from photobucket.com
Day Three

“Sleep, I need more sleep…" zzZZzzZzzz

More difficult to stay hydrated when you're asleep.

Day Five

The longer I'm sick, the harder is to be on Team Natural Cure. 

“So much pressure in my head. Natural Schmatural. Sudafed me.”

Ah, Sudafed. That's the stuff. 
Down the rabbit hole. Hello pseudo, my old friend.
from vintagedisneyalice.blogspot.com
Some Day (or 2) Later

I know if I still have a lot of pressure and pain after taking Sudafed for a couple of days, this is not a fleeting case of the sniffles.

“Oh my aching face-holes. Can your head actually explode from sinus pressure? If I lean too far forward, I see stars.”

About the amount of sympathy I get from the Hubs
from zrhbzeds.homeip.net
Day Eight
(waited too long to call the doctor, no evening/Saturday appt)
“Okay, I need something stronger, do we have any old half-finished antibiotics anywhere?”

*Digging through every cabinet everywhere*
from npr.org

Day Nine
“Aaahh now I have a rash! This has to be all connected. According to WebMD I have meningitis. That sounds serious. 
I can’t cook, I don’t want my last days on earth to be spent in the kitchen.”

I mean, really.

Day Eleven

“Why do I taste metal?” 
I look MUCH more pale & creepy-clownlike than either of these ladies.
from photobucket.com
Day Fourteen

“I took all the random antibiotics, and some random yellow pill I found in the box o’ medicine. I feel be…………” 
BASTARDS!
from photobucket.com
Day Sixteen

“I've been sick since when? Really?"

*Telling Google all symptoms since the beginning* 

“According to the internet, these symptoms are signs of an apocalypse.”

 from zombieresearchsociety.com
Luckily, the apocalypse was a Zombie apocalypse so I'm no longer dead, I'm just the usual undead of parents with small children: Mombie.



Epilogue

I'm finally feeling better. No doctor, so suck it healthcare system. 

___________________

Note: We do have insurance and a doctor, but having to drag my 2 kids to the doctor with me, waiting half an hour in the lobby, and another at least half an hour in a tiny room with 2 little ones that HATE the doctor's office is more torture than getting high medicating with decongestant and "toughing it out." 
By that I mean whining at my husband that I'm probably going to die soon.

29 comments:

  1. OMG This is daily with me. For a year round allergy suffer who lives in the one state that has the most of her allergens(seriously live in florida and one of my allergens is palm trees). .....Zrtyec and benedryl daily. DAILY. and on top of that. I can't take sudafed because of my heart...I start to get a little panicky if I wake up still stuffy at night...I prefer my sinus's to feel like the sarhara than lock ness lake. IF i make a doctors appt. I miraculously get better knowing this I keep putting it off thinking once I do make that appt I will be better anyway. There are many days that I seriously think Ripping my sinuses out can't be worse than how I am feeling. I mean I probably would die from rampant bloodloss but that would be so much better than the stuffy icky head feeling and the throbbing that those suckers can do..right? no ...eh...

    and once again I have to post as Anonymous because neither google or wordpress will recognize me.

    Chronically Sick Manic Mother.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. UGH! That blows. This is going to sound crazy, but have you tried things like no dairy? Just to see if you feel better? A lot of people feel allergy relief from changes in their diet. Mine have gotten better, but change of seasons is a tough time. For congestion, I hang my head over a pot of boiling water until I can't take it anymore. I cannot bring myself to do the netty pot. I know I should try it, but it scares the bee-hay-Zeus out of me. I imagine it's like water-boarding yourself. *shudder* It's like when I watch people snorkle or scuba dive on TV, I suddenly start breathing all heavy, like I'm going to faint. So KoOkY!

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  2. So funny! I go through a similar progression as well. I try to stick to the natural stuff, and sometimes (sometimes) if I take some honey and apple cider vinegar early enough, I can avoid a cold/sinus/allergy spell. But at the end of the day, you have to do what you can to get well for your family. Thanks for making us laugh, and wishing you an uneventful cold/flu season!

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    1. I am the same way. Sometimes that combo of citrus water, ginger, citrus, Airborne, etc., works pretty well. But sooooometimes, I need my Sudafed! I can see why people use it to make meth, it's awesome.
      Here's hoping we all have a happy, healthy winter!

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  3. I'm still claiming allergies in spite of the fact that my breastie (my bff) keeps telling me she got me sick. And I second that "Suck it, Healthcare System"

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    1. Whatever it is, I hope you feel better. I use congestion as an excuse to get sushi, for the WASABI! That or horseradish works very well. Feel better!

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  4. Replies
    1. I like it! If I'm going to feel sick, may as well make it WORTH IT!

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  5. Don't forget that even though you have healthcare, they'll only pay for a small chunk of everything and fight you on everything else. The best advice: just don't ever get sick or hurt.

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    1. Agreed. I just saw a meme from a Canadian blogger that was a punch to my big, fat American ego. Over the Canadian flag, it read:
      "Whenever I see a joke about Canadians, I go to the doctor to have my feelings checked for free." Ouch.

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  6. Holy Sick. I feel worse for just reading that. Ha! Glad you're more better. xoxo

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    1. hahaha thanks! You better take some Sudafed with vodka just in case! Preventative medicine.

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  7. my dad swears by a couple shots of vodka with red pepper to cure a cold ever since a trip to moscow where that is what the DOCTOR prescribed. those are my kind of people!

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    1. That sounds awesome! My dad always said for a throat coated in junk, eat potato chips and beer. Sounds WEIRD, but it clears out all the gunk.

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  8. You sound like me! I dont get sick THAT long, but pretty long lol I load up on OJ and Theraflu. If you haven't tried Theraflu (Or an off brand) yet I would! I was starting to feel icky this weekend and made a cup, layed in bed watching Walking Dead while I drank it, and felt better the next day! All you do is mix in some hot water with the packet and drink!!


    http://www.completeblissblog.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
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    1. It's been awhile since I tried that. I'll have to check it out again. I did feel better for a couple of days after I took the Airborne tablets, but I also ate sushi with a LOT of wasabi that day and drank a bunch of beer, so I thought THAT is what made me feel better. Thanks!

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  9. This was too funny! I had a cold recently but blasted it out in a few days by huffing down Nyquil and Dayquil. Damn, I love Nyquil!

    Then again, wasabi and beer sounds good too!

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    Replies
    1. Wasabi works! NyQuil & DayQuil are a good 1-2 punch, but they TASTE SO BAD. UGH.

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    2. Ha, that could be me ANY DAY, not just when I'm sick!

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  10. 2 things: 1) Sudafed is the greatest thing ever. I totally feel like an addict as I handle over my driver's license and money to get my fix. 2) "Whenever I see a joke about Canadians, I go to the doctor to have my feelings checked for free." HAHAHAHAHA! That's awesome.

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    1. Sudafed IS the best thing ever! It makes my sisters jittery, but it makes me feel normal(ish).
      That Canadian joke TOTALLY cracked me up!

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  11. I married a guy that works in the Over The Counter Medicine category - I am like a walking drugstore of free samples. Thank God.

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  12. "The itis (being a lazy slob)" cracked me up as well as "faceholes." Loved all the pictures too. Glad you're feeling a bit better.

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    1. Thank you. I would always rather *I* be sick than my kids. Especially since it gives me an excuse to take Sudafed.

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  13. I'm going on like week 5 of a slightly sore to extremely sore throat and now a strange rash. Could you be my WebMD please? Is it the mombie apocalypse? And if so, what is the prescription? Wine? Please say it is wine....

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  14. I'm going on like week 5 of a slightly sore to extremely sore throat and now a strange rash. Could you be my WebMD please? Is it the mombie apocalypse? And if so, what is the prescription? Wine? Please say it is wine....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wine never hurt anymommy, I'm sure there's Vitamin C in there somewhere. Just to be sure, you might want to cut up oranges and apples in tiny pieces, soak them in the wine as long as you can hold out, then drink the wine and eat the fruit. You should feel like a million clams in no time!

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