Last week was a month long. It was swell and now that the swelling has gone down, mayhaps I can laugh about it. Early wake-ups, post vacation, teenager stress, bad news and weather formed a mediocre storm.
|There's no perfect stormTROOPER either|
I don't believe in perfect storms, why set an unrealistic expectation for storms based on superficiality? This is what I'm getting at. I'm starting to make even less sense than usual, and my bar is pretty low.
Last week started out solid, I was well rested from vacation. Timing allowed me to blow through the entire Season 2 of Orange is the New Black in less than a week, which is a weird thing to brag about, but usually I have tons of shorties around and it takes me all week just to get through a couple 1/2 hour programs. So anyway, Season 2 was much more fun and I finally finished my post comparing it to Facts of Life. It's a long story, but if you only read ONE mashup of a prison show and Facts of Life today, make it this one, click HERE.
Between the Life and waking up at 4am, things started to take a Southern turn humor-wise. I needed to write a guest post, high pressure situation for me. It's one thing to suck balls full time on your own blog, but when someone asks me to bring the funny to their blog, especially when I'm sleep-deprived, I worry. I can usually get the ball rolling with some hashtag games on Twitter.
Don't know what in the world wide web that is? That's when someone lays down a word challenge like:
#FoodAthletes - combine a food and an athlete.
I came up with: Ball Park Frank Thomas and some others.
Last week I saw #AddSausageToAMovieTitle and came up with some that seemed funny at the time.
And added horrible pictures, that made me laugh even more.
Found this hilarious
This should have been a red flag.
|This cracked me UP|
for whatever reason
Well, I see the Buzzfeed churning out "8 Reasons Condiments are Like Forest Animals" and other ridiculous bullspit every day, so I tried it.
I wrote "6 Reasons My Kids Are Crappy Burglars" and it was okay. Click that title if you want to judge for yourself.
Now at least I know if times were tough I could churn out shitty numbered lists for Buzzfeed to pay the rent.
I know, I know, so could your Great Grandmother.
"4 People Who Could Write Buzzfeed Headlines Unconscious"
Your Great Uncle Don, post head injury
Your Slightly-Racist 100 yr old Grandfather
Your Cousin in Rehab on Anti-Psychotics, big hit actually
The Medical Cat Who Predicts the Next Person to Die, if you placed a keyboard on the ground so he can walk back and forth with his paws.
Speaking of that, this is part of my favorite community: The Ten Things of Thankful community. Click *HERE* to link up and tell us some things you're thankful for!
I saw that Harrison Ford broke an ankle on the set of Star Wars Episode VII, but thankfully he's only expected to be out 6-8 weeks. They have plenty to film during that time so they don't expect any delays.
This week was a little better than last week. Thankfully we got our new doors, though they took from 9am - almost 7pm to install. And of course the Universe scheduled us on a day when it was rainy and I had a ton of kids here, and Lola was not loving the loud noises of the power tools, and blah....
but I would've been disappointed if everything went smoothly, ya know?
You wouldn't believe, unless you've done it, what all goes in to just replacing a door. It took us MONTHS to pick some, get them ordered, then there's the locks, hardware, etc., AND if you don't have someone do the installation, well I don't even KNOW what all went in to that, but it sounded painful as it took the guy all day.
They're here, they're installed and I don't need to hip-check them to close them! The front door also has a window and it's SOO MUCH more bright in here.
|What a difference a door makes! And that little window.|
There's a mirror on the opposite wall, so light is reflected.
I'm just thankful we don't have a funeral this weekend. We are helping a friend clean out his deceased father's house, and we have no baby sitters so we're trying to help clean, fix-up and haul stuff out WITH 2 toddlers so it's not exactly a jamboree at the end of the rainbow, but I'm trying to stay on the thankful side. Thankful we're healthy and able to help a friend.
Next week I'm thankful we are going on vacation, trying to focus on that. I have to get through two 4am wake-ups, then Thursday night we head to my sister's lake house, which is better than Disneyland because NO LINES.
|Love Disney but THESE CROWDS though!|
We usually stay the week, but since the 4th is on a Thursday we're only staying for a long weekend this year, but it's better than nothing. The kids are so thrilled, they've asked about it every day.
"How many MORE wake-ups?!"
Less than 7, kids, hang in there.
|My sister says THIS is waiting for us. Because: MURICA!|
|My siblings and me on the lake. I think we have wax lips, though I don't remember why. Other than: Weirdos.|
We're doing a weird thing w/our hands, that's how my dads fingers were cut off. He was a Press Feeder.
Then when we come back the husband took some time off so we'll do Staycation stuff, mostly projects around the house we've been neglecting. They need to be done though.
That's worth more than 10. I had hoped to come back and add more funny, but I'm spent and about out of time.
I did find this awesome-looking recipe for Beer Popsicles!
Hope everyone is having a wonderful summer so far! Happy 4th of July in case I don't post anything before then, which is entirely possible!
|Found on Pinterest|
it didn't say WHY