Memorial Day QUICKIE

It's Memorial Day weekend, and you know what that means.

Patriotic recipes, drinks and crafts involving red, white and blue Mason jars, barbecues, and if social media is to be believed, also something about the military. 
From Betsy Ross' Pinterest, (Danielle Holub)
OF COURSE there are tons of Home Improvement sales, because we JUST paid for new doors, so naturally we will find them on sale for much less. I'm immediately putting all sales papers into the recycle bin just to be safe.

A Facebook-esque overly emotional 
"Happy Birthday" 
to our recliner chairs, which we purchased on mad sale 4 years ago Memorial Day weekend. We love you!
(Yes, this is how annoying you sound when you post to your dog or your baby, btw. 
Someone needed to say it.) 
::The More You Know:: *shooting star*

The other reason for Memorial Day? 

Why to kick off the season of wearing white again.

Wait, there's more to this day? 

Holidays are hard.

Have a great weekend, I hope you don't have to drive in crazy traffic. Or drive at all, and you can just relax and enjoy beers sent from the Universe!


  1. In case you're new here or to the internet in general, if you feel tempted to remind me what this day is REALLY about, you should know that I am very aware and this is a humor blog. A silly, stupid humor blog. There eleventy BILLION blogs and web sites that post serious messages about every holiday, if you prefer that, you should probably go to there.

    1. I prefer the funny version. I have no idea what it's about, but booze and tidy whities does my brain just fine. And probably something about BBQ, right?

    2. It's a quite serious way to remember all the military men and women that have made the ultimate sacrifice to fight for our freedom, HOWEVER everyone who isn't 4 years old already knows that and it's just like Mother's Day or Valentine's Day where it becomes a commercial sharknado of shame. EVERY single company, social media channel and your Aunt Sally will be posting flags and cemetery pictures all weekend. So I'll be scheduling corny, tasteless jokes to post all weekend and avoiding that. I have a low tolerance for repetitive annoyance. It's how I know I'll never be a big blogger. I just can't even write the same Open Letter to Miley Cyrus that everyone else writes when a news article comes out, and do a tribute to whatever else everyone else is doing. Which is probably what most people want to READ but I just don't have that in me right now.
      And yes, TONS of talk about wearing WHITE after Memorial Day (but not AFTER Labor Day, unless it's Winter White, which whatever) and LOTS of Barbecue and gross recipes with mayonnaise because 'Murica! :D

  2. Tighty whities...so wrong, yet so right. If writing an open letter to Miley Cyrus includes telling her what an asshat she is, then I'll gladly do it.
    Right, I'm off to make myself some Murica.

    1. If there is anyone who KNOWS she's an asshat, it's her. It's totally part of her marketing plan. Her music is the recipe for vomit, but she DOES get herself some free press every freaking week almost. She is the valedictorian graduate of the Michael Jackson School of No Such Thing As Bad Press. She'll be making commercials to enroll in the online program shortly I imagine, with some child-size wifebeater onesie showing off sideboob, side vagina and probably side inner colon, since that is the only part of her anatomy we haven't been punched in the eyes with yet. There, I think I just wrote that letter for us! Pour some 'Murica on me!

  3. I am sooo glad I popped over here. Sangria, here I come!!!

  4. I seriously LOVE YOU more than you realize!!! I love your Facebook shout out to your recliner chairs! AWESOME!! It makes me think about all the wonderful posts I get from certain folks about their dogs!!! I will NEVER open a facebook up for Buster! It's just not going to happen. But I know some folks that have done that and they actually get on and leave posts and annoying shit like...."I chased the neighbors cat today, and my mommy was upset!" O.O For reals though.... Some of these people happen to be related to the man I am married to and it ANNOYS me!!! ;) Anyway....I am exactly the same when it comes to writing about the big thing happening. I just can't do it! I will try to get in on the most latest thing and after seeing 5 million posts that have been written about the same thing I am over it! I also know that is why my blog will never be flooded with folks because I usually write about cleaning toilets and shit like that....I have NO desire to write about Miley Cyrus's latest whatever. BUT can I just say...I LOVE this post about Memorial day...and I think I got way off topic in this comment. I have had a few twisted lemonade's tonight and I have a 9 year old that is puking so....yeah...

    1. Sorry about Pukey, hope everyone is all better today, and it doesn't make the rounds around your whole house!
      I've seen those FB accounts, too. There are a couple that are cute and funny, but the others.....uh, I don't know.
      Have an awesome 3-day weekend!

  5. What a BEAUTIFUL drink. I can't say whether it would taste good or not--vodka reminds me of how rubbing alcohol would probably taste! But I love the presentation.

    1. They do actually taste pretty similar. Both good mixers ;) I imagine THIS recipe, so full of fruit, would just taste fruity.
      The great thing about vodka is it can be infused easily with fruit flavor, or you could just BUY the already flavored kind. Or just drink beer, it's so much easier.

  6. The More You Know shooting star! Yes! Hahahaha. That drink is gorgeous. I would have to take a shitload of pictures of it and post it on FB before drinking, thoough...;)

    1. I would, too! I would probably not spend that much time making it pretty, by the time I cut the star fruit the vodka would already be in my belly.

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