Dang
I was tagged. No, not graffiti this time, a “Who the Hell Are You?” blog post, from Mom-spirational blog. This seems
right up my alley, since those words are the EXACT name of my 2nd ever blog entry here.
It
started with Jenn at My Daily Jennism and she’s
pretty awesome, so why not keep it going. Plus I was threatened chain-letter
style so what the fudge. They are questions about me, my favorite subject. I’m
one of the coolest girls I know.
My
job is to answer 25 easy peasy questions – then tag people.
1. Where
were you born? I was born a poor black man.
Wait, that’s Steve Martin. I was born in Chi-CAH-go, and those TV Chicago accents?
Are terrible. Very few people actually speak that way anymore. Only old timey
chaps from “over by der.”
from zimbio.com |
2. Were
you named after someone? I was born on Christmas Day and
my name is Joy, so you guessed it. Regis Philben’s wife.
He’s my real dad and
his wife said she could forgive him his indiscretion if my mom named me after
her. Well well well.
Also?
In case I have to address this in a court of law, my Grandmother may have heard the song at church and
sang it to my mom on the phone when I was born. Now I’m here to tell you all
about accepting Jesus Christ as your personal Avon Representative.
3. How
many children do you have? Three. That I know of but
I was pretty slutty at stages of my life. No regrets. I do have 3 kids, and one of them is actually kind of nice. She’s young though, it might just be a phase.
4. How many pets do you have? One. Dumeril’s boa constrictor. He’s about 5 feet long now. Very sweet and docile. He sleeps with the baby. (Obviously not really. He is deathly afraid of the baby.) This picture is him 3 years ago, he's bigger now. Under that log on the left? Is his shedded skin.
This is our snake in his cage, doing his yoga |
5. Your
worst injury. Birth. I swear I have never been the same.
Oh
and I did break my ass once. I fell down the stairs and landed on my tailbone. Turns out they can’t put your whole ass in a cast so there is not much you can do,
except sit on a damn inflatable donut, take pain killers and never have your
ass be the same. This was over ten years ago and I STILL have a bad ass-day sometimes. Maybe it was a good thing, though, because before that? I
could SIT for a looong, looong time. I mean, I don’t wanna brag.
6. Do
you have a special talent? You mean other than sitting? (Who is asking the questions now?) I can
kick my husband’s ASS IN at the carnival game Whack-A-Mole. He is super smart and competitive, he
beats me at EVERY game in the world except Boggle and Whack-A-Mole. Now he won’t
PLAY those with me anymore. Hrrmpff! Wanna play?
7. Favorite
thing to bake. Cookies, even though I have to make a
double batch so that some may actually make it to the oven. Kids birthday cakes,
mostly because I’m cheap (they’re not always good but if I let sucking stop me,
I would never do anything.)
8. Favorite
Fast Food. Always had a Taco Bell thang. Not just when I’m
drunk, but especially when I’m drunk.
9. Would
you bungee jump? I don’t think so. Everybody has a price, but I would have to be paid a
lot of money. A friend did this over water, and painstakingly described the
process of continually SMACKING his whole body into the water, being ripped
back up, hurling back down to SMACK his whole body into the water, over and
over and over. I can’t imagine doing this over concrete would be better.
10. What
is the first thing you notice about people? Depends on the
person. If it’s THIS person in the picture, I’d say his jaunty hat. I love a good hat.
from dbsmyth.com |
In general, I remember the way
people make me FEEL. If someone is super sexy but mean, I don’t want to spend time
with them.
If someone is very smart, but makes me feel stupid, I want to find what makes them insecure and feel the need to prove their intelligence, then systematically break their spirit.
If someone has an amaze-balls handlebar mustache? Chances are they are going to make me feel as giddy as a schoolgirl.
Whatever and whoever you are, think about how you treat people and how that makes them feel.
11. When
was the last time you cried? Friday night. And all the
damn time. Every five minutes. Over-tired, stressed out, overwhelmed, don’t
have the Three Kids thing figured out yet. Friday I once again lost, among other things, my
driver’s license. Yeah, I’m THAT idiot.
12. Any
current worries. Too many. I could fill the internets.
Money, disorganization, laziness, depression, my horrible memory. Did I leave
the iron on? Just kidding. I never use the iron.
13. Name
3 drinks you drink regularly. Coffee, milk, water w/MIO
or a little bit of juice. I wish Beer, but it makes me too tired.
14. What’s
your favorite book? Geek Love by Katherine Dunn; The BFG
by Roald Dahl; and Cruddy by Lynda Barry. They’re SOO GOOD. Pin them, add to them to your list(s).
15. Would
you like to be a pirate. As a LARPer or on the internet, yes. In a play
or for Halloween, Hayall to the yes. Real life? I’m land locked.
16. Favorite Smells. Garlic, GINGER
(obsessed,) fresh cut grass, new baby, anything being cooked by my husband. And
kind of? Bleach. It means something is clean (finally.)
17. Why do you blog? I crave adult
interaction. I like to have a creative outlet. I need a place where I can vent,
swear and let the MEANer side out without feeling guilty about it. It builds up like a tea
kettle. My mind fills with junk, writing some of it down clears it out a little. I don't have a lot of time, but I get down what I can when I can.
18. What
song do you want played at your funeral? “Let It Be” and/or
old timey jazz, that music has always made me feel very nostalgic. However my
family has a saying “Kiedy wy jesteście martwi wasz osioł nie jest szef”
(copied from http://www.poltran.com/pl.php4) It’s Polish, in English it means “When you’re
dead your ass is not the boss.” So whatever my family picks. I would guess "Superfreak" or 70’s/80’s punk music or 90s grunge b/c that was the modern music I liked.
19. What
is your least favorite thing about yourself. My feet. I
have really ugly feet. Other than that, I’m Fun on a Bun. If there is something
I don’t like, I take steps to change it. I struggle with my weight, but if I
bothered me? I would work out more. Or throw down a salad once in awhile maybe. Why don't I do that more?
20. Favorite
hobby. Reading and hanging out w/family/friends. Playing
board games when I have time. I love to play Harry Potter Trading Card game
w/my husband. (Did I not mention we’re
dorks?)
21.
Name Something you’ve done, you never thought you would do? Play Harry Potter Trading Card game. Almost every single thing I’ve done since marrying my husband. He’s making me
soft. One specific example: I only wore dark, gothy colored clothes before and listened to scary music, but he
likes pink and bright colors, and happy music. I don’t know how he got me to cave, but between
me and my TWO daughters my laundry is: Light color clothes, Dark color clothes, Pink.
22. What
do you look for in a friend.
Momspirational, the lovely lady who tagged me, answered with SOLID GOLD. She wrote:
“Honesty. Sense of humor.
Non-judgmental. If I have to act different to be around you – I would
rather be alone.” WORD.
I can forgive some of those things if you
are SUPER BIG FUN. I like that in a person.
23. Favorite
Fun things to do? Games, Cards, Travel, Binge Drinking. Haven’t done
those much lately, we’re in the Baby stage, which is awesome, lately my fave
thing is SLEEP.
24. Pet
peeves. Judgmental people, narrow-minded thinking, mixing
of church and state. When my kids don’t SLEEP at night. Arugula. It tastes SO BAD to me.
25. Whats
the last thing that made you laugh? Check my Facebook page for a play-by-play. Some are weird thoughts that are too long of a story
to explain, but earlier today: Mike Rowe, of Dirty Jobs fame. He had a long
story on his personal Facebook page about drinking coffee then running. I’m
sure you can imagine. If not, I posted it on my page 2/25/13, it’s pretty dern
funny.
Okay Now for the Hard Part –
Tagging Others.
If I tagged you, lets find out
who the hell you are. If you're a reader, please click these links to read about the wonderful bloggers I tagged, they are amazing.
I absolutely LOVE this quote:
ReplyDelete"They’re not always good but if I let sucking stop me, I would never do anything."
That is awesome stuff right there!! Thanks for tagging me!!!
That is pretty much my motto in life. I DO suck at a lot of stuff, I'm clumsy, impatient, don't always follow directions, but I like to try new stuff so I just wing it.
DeleteUsually the first time (first few or MANY times) I do something, it's COMICALLY bad, and what do I do about it? Post it on Facebook for the world to see. Failing has pretty much made me who I am. Still a work in progress, but always trying :) and ALWAYS laughing at myself! That's why I like your blog, it's not all "My life is perfect" and you have a great outlook about the HUMAN part of like. Like kids missing the bus :)
I love your Facebook page and your blog!
Well, you deserve it, and I gave you another ... http://crapnoonetellsyou.blogspot.com/2013/02/parent-bloggerswe-are-cult-and.html
ReplyDeleteOh my, here's a chance for me to give my Oh-So-Dramatic well-rehearsed yet SUPER DRAMATICALLY SURPRISED acceptance speech:
Delete"Omigod" <> "I just can't believe it! Lil ole me?! Couldn't be!" <> "I didn't prepare a speech or anything, buuuuut I would like to thank these 1,500 people: My kids, my husband, my laptop......"
I will work on my assignment at the baby's naptime. Barring some unforeseen surprise that having 3 kids and watching an extra collicky baby can throw at you!