I am sooo glad now that we did all that NOTHING last weekend when we had a sitter, and glad we got that rest.
I'm also thankful being rested, and being at this stage of life I am finally calm enough not to freak out when my kids get sick (even if it's ON me) because "this too shall pass."
It was the first time our little girls got something like this, we've been really lucky that when they get sick it's only for about a day and then they're fine. Mayhaps that fun fact I read on eating your boogers being good for you IS true, because they are a coupla lil gold diggers. Anyhoo, my husband hadn't had to deal with the little ones getting stomach-sick, (other than baby spitup, which I'm sorry to say is not the same.) I'll spare you the gross details but kids don't understand it, they get really scared and that makes everything worse.
My son had gotten something and I remembered the most important thing is to hold them, comfort them and keep telling them everything is okay. Lola is 4, she got it and was a trooper, but the 2 yr old is in her screaming stage, which made being totally showered in grossness a whole new level of painful, but I was miraculously calm.
Years ago, I may not have been, but I didn't even let the screaming break me. Luckily my husband was there to bring me tissues to put in my ears. My ears really can't take the screaming, that is my kill-switch trigger.
My Nana told me one time that when a child screams it flips a switch in her brain that says "kill kill kill."
I was terrified when she told me that, I now know EXACTLY what she means. It's an auditory thing, same reason I hate going to a movie theater unless I have ear plugs. Sooo, as a parent of 3 who watches extra kids, I have tons of ear plugs everywhere. My middle child was a colic baby. We all lived. I can now handle anything.
Like 2 toddlers with a stomach bug. The important thing when a baby or toddler is about to be sick, just grab any towel or blanket if you can find one, throw it on like a backward cape because you're about to do some superhero shit. Towel in FRONT, bro.
|Kind of, but you want to turn that around to the front|
This is not about the gross thing that is happening to you, that will easily wash off, this is about a tiny child who is terrified and feels like they're possessed by a painful demon. This is the most horrifying thing that's happened to them, because it's happening NOW and they don't remember much else.
This is pretty much the speech I screamed at my shell-shocked husband who apparently war-panicked and just stood there like a front-line soldier fresh out of Basic Training.
He's usually the calm parent. I don't know when I became Sergeant Hulka, but a family needs a strong Big Toe in that situation.
Someone to snap you out of it and yell "Move it, Rookie! You're gonna get dirty, don't just stand there and don't you run like a coward." Except you have to yell that with your eyes, or you'll just freak the kids out more.
It's not that I wasn't horrifiedshockedworried as well, I mean the thing I worry most about is my children obviously, with my first child I panicked about every little thing, but somehow between having 3 kids, and volunteering in, and sometimes living in, horrible conditions, I'm able to inexplicably stay calm during panicable conditions. I guess that's my superpower.
Hey it could be worse. For years my only superpower was ill-timed super sized sarcasm, and that is almost never appreciated. With age comes wisdom, a little more patience and knowledge of timing, and a lot of knowing about the "time and place" where these things are more likely to be appreciated. I'm still working on that, and this blog helps immensely.
My point is every experience, good or bad, brings knowledge and every year of life, good or bad, makes me more comfortable in my own skin. I can't even get into the vast gaping holes of my knowledge, let's just say it took me a lot longer to learn about life. I learned almost everything the hard way, and I would not ever go backward in my life, not for all the money/power/daydrinking in the world.
When I see people complaining about their birthdays or talking about the negative parts of growing old, I just smile to myself.
I can't speak for anyone else, but I feel like if you've been through a lot in your life, try to look at this way:
It's behind you, it can probably only get better in one way or another, and soon you'll get to an age where a lot of problems just drop away because you magically realize they don't matter.
So many things that you've agonized over, superficial or otherwise, can just be let go. As soon as you let them go. You will figure out how, you will figure out what, or you'll just be too tired to care and it will work itself out. Either way, it's bliss. This letting go is absolute bliss. I wish I could teach it.
I welcome each year, I'm sure that will stop at some point, but for now bring on the wrinkles, I don't mind my gray hair, maybe someday soon I'll be able to buy a freaking beer without being carded! Come at me saggy body parts. I may be getting longer in the boob--and speaking of that, who do I talk to about retiring these boobs?
I'm over 40, I've carried them since the 5th grade when one other girl and I were the only 2 in the class with boobs, can I be done now?
Can I donate them?
Is there a "Give a boob, take a boob" tray?
Like "Locks of Love" but "Jugs of Love."
Get at me whoever, I'm so done.
That's neither here nor there, but I do enjoy the wisdom and calm age brings. That at least my old age has calmed my teets, hakuna'ed my tatas and whatnot.
I'm blissfully happy not to freak out over bad days, flat tires, crabby moods, crabby kids, kids' odd phases, crappy weather, Mondays, and whatever else We the People continue to whine incessantly about. I understand we're just venting, I do it too, and my age and my experience tell me that too shall pass.
And in the meantime, I stay off Facebook at times like:
and read the blogs of my amazing smart, wonderful, funny, interesting blogger friends! And everything does pass, so much the faster.
I've been puked on by a lot of kids... and since it was usually while working at a day care, school, or babysitting, I didn't even have the comfort of it being my own children! When they're throwing up their instinct is to run into your arms, instead of to the toilet or some other receptacle. My trick is to just disassociate from the puke... don't think about what it is, just focus on comforting the child. Also it might help if you put the towel on your front instead of your back!ReplyDelete
It is DEFINITELY worse, for whatever reason, when it's not your kid! I said this SAME THING last week Tuesday when a toddler got me. SO MUCH WORSE, and I don't even know why. You played it right, go to your happy (non-puke) place! And yes, towel in the FRONT! This is NOT a mullet situation!Delete
OMG, dude, kid projectile vomit will make you become a ninja superhero before you can say, "Avengers assemble" or Cowabunga (whatever the ninja turtles say). Seriously, the first time my son ever had a stomach bug, I just sat on the couch with him next to a pile of clean towels. Every time he started chicken necking, I grabbed a new towel and covered myself because I knew if he was going to puke, he would choose me as his target. But I was calm.ReplyDelete
As far as age goes, I think we (interesting and wonderful people that we are) are like wine. We just get better with age. Unless we get corked. Then we taste sour and bitter and all around bad.
Chicken necking, that is the most perfect description! Except for my 2 year old, she would start SCREAMING first, then pushing away the towel, turning her head to the side at the last minute, she's a real piece of work. We went through ALL THE TOWELS, started using blankets, robes, sheets, you name it. And I do kind of feel like a bit of a ninja now.Delete
"Unless we get corked" is hysterical. I hope you have a Tshirt or bumper sticker with that saying somewhere.
Oh man, I hate that they get so scared at this point of the puksies...ReplyDelete
I'm looking forward to a zen-like calm in my life. I turn 40 this year...this that will do the trick?
Yes! If not immediately, then soon!Delete
All the thoughts will be CHILL Thoughts.
I've been puked on and crapped on by 4 dogs, so I feel like I can handle kids. Or maybe that's just what I tell myself to justify all of that puke/crap. Just remember that it eventually gets better. Sure, by then you'll be too old and feeble to enjoy it. But it DOES get better. "It" being death.ReplyDelete
By dogs? Oh, that is WNL: Whole Nother Level. I can't handle dogs, they have to be walked and junk. Kids are much easier. Until they get to their teen years, and then I am RIGHT THERE WITH YOU: Waiting for the sweet release of death.Delete
My 4 year old has probably thrown up at least a dozen times in her life. A third of those made it into the toilet. A third in her bed/crib. And a third on me. 0 thirds on my wife! What the hell?ReplyDelete
Your wife is a ninja, I'm told that can happen once your birth children. You grow eyes in the back of your head, and you can hear a pindrop 2 stories down, but only if it's by one of your children who does NOT want you to hear it. She's obviously a powerful Jedi, mayhaps she has extra metaclorians.Delete
No fun at all. Glad you made it through.ReplyDelete
Stomach bugs are the worst but after the first one you definitely achieve veteran status. I still freak out a little about some things but after reading this, realize I don't as much as I used to about others. Huh! Maybe this means I'm growing up!ReplyDelete
The boobs though?!! That is the funniest thing I've read all day!
Thanks, I'm glad you got a chuckle. Here's to aging like fine wine, or at least a fine box o'whatever is on sale!Delete
I've been puked and pooped on by so many kids and animals that I hardly even flinch anymore. Of course, it helps that anosmia is my super-power. Glad you're all feeling better!ReplyDelete
I've said, posted and tweeted multiple times that of all my senses, I could part with SMELL first and foremost. There are way more bad smells than good. Espesh with kids and teenagers stinkin up the place.Delete
Yes, you're right - age brings peace of mind. I hope your boobs find peace too - I'm sure they've given you years of loyal service.ReplyDelete
hahaha "loyal service" I picture them in a jumpsuit filling up the car with gas and wiping the windshield, and it's a really weird picture.Delete
I agree, age and experience really dose make everything seem so much manageable. After 15 years of parenting and three kids there isn't much that gets me rattled anymore. Though I do hate when the kids are really sick. Glad yours are feeling better! :)ReplyDelete
Thank you. I do love this calm, I wish I could be this calm over the teenager's shenanigans, but in comparison there is NOTHING the little girls can really do that's that bad.Delete
Ugh - my gal and her parents all got that same stomach bug last week. She is there taking care of her mom after hip replacement surgery. They were all throwing up for days. Good thing I stayed at home in the city and did not catch it!ReplyDelete
As for gray hair I have it now too. Think of us as Silver Foxes!
You were lucky to miss it. Somehow I didn't get it either, even though I was literally swimming in it.Delete
Ha, Silver Foxes. Somehow men always look better/more distinguished and women just usually look OLD and tired. Well I look tired even I do dye my hair, but the gray hair makes it worse!
Stomach bugs - hate'em. I've got 3 kids too and have faced many types of vomit (and I agree that baby spit-up is not the same). Isn't it great to get to that point in life when things just aren't that big of a deal any more?ReplyDelete
YES! Especially since the oldest is now a teenager, and he gives me sooo, so many other wonderful things to worry (or not worry) about on any typical day! It's nice to be able to let some GO.Delete