and that all goes without saying, but since it's TEN THINGS and my TWO little girls are fighting for attention, so let's just count that as things, m'kay? Thanks.
4. I'm thankful that BSBF B.S.Black Friday is OVER, because it makes my soul want to puke. If you don't know what that is, thank all the gods, old and new! American retail stores offer slightly discounted prices, mostly on sub-standard electronics, but you have to go when stores should be closed: ON actual Thanksgiving Day and/or through that night, when you should be SLEEPING. This makes people crazy. Obviously.
Ever watch reality TV shows? You shouldn't, they're whore-ible. They keep people up late, and wake them up early ON PURPOSE, because it makes humans coo-koo pants crazy to go without sleep. It's a FACT.
There were shootings in a Kohl's parking lot this year not far from my home, and I live near Chicago so yes, that happens every day unfortunately, but should we be ENCOURAGING this madness, America? For a few extra bucks to stores that are NOT hurting for money. Shame, shame, we know your name. And it's a swear.
|Lie, I do not. I kind of love it.|
5. Thankful for my blog where I can vent about it, give people ideas for NOT Black-Friday-ing, give ONLINE places to get great gifts and deals, and also laugh about the madness. Sometimes whattayagonnado? You have to laugh.
When I say 'you' I mean *I* have to laugh.
6. My blog's Facebook page, where I can vent about my soul nausea and get the adult human interaction I crave, and have a much-needed laugh.
8. Specifically e-Bay, the best thing in the history of forever, for a girl who HATES freaking shopping. With the white hot intensity of a thousand suns. I did EVERY SINGLE BIT of my holiday shopping online 4 years ago, and I swear I could hear choirs of angels singing in my head as I sat in my comfy recliner on my fat hams with my fat feet up. But that might have been the YouTube videos I played of angels singing.
We were broke, I was in pain, and I got everyone little tchotchkes (pronounced 'chach-ki' Polish word for "junky knick knacks") and jokey-joke gifts and didn't have to wait in any roller coaster lines. I did have to start in August to spread out the cost, but I got everyone at least SOMETHING and they were all super happy, and said my gifts ruled and I should be a personal shopper. So if you need me to do that for you, email me at firstname.lastname@example.org. The End.
I already bought myself a 2013 Christmas/Birthday gift (well, my husband approved and he did pay for it, so it counts.) I ordered these amazing, comfy Star Wars stretchy pants to go with my husband's fleece Darth Vader ComfyTown house pants. You can have them too for the low price of $12 NO SHIPPING! Act now.
|I'm REALLY going to test the stretchy-ness of these bad boys!|
10. Speaking of teens, this is weird, but I'm thankful for Disney and the kids of Disney growing up before our very eyes, some of them determined to let everyone know they are NO LONGER a Disney kid, and full-on rebelling hard core!
Well okay, hard care might be a bit dramatic, they're not violent murderers exactly, just eye-rapers with their scary gross fashion choices, on stage weed-smokin' (in Amsterdam where it's legal) icky-music producing, young adults.
|JOKE. Found at Snarkfest Blog's Facebook page|
Somehow this makes me feel better as a parent. It just goes to show that even under THEE MOST STRICT of guidance, teens are going to be teens. Some are going to rebel, push the limits of their boundaries, and test the patience of everyone and everything around them. My son is a Jedi Master of this. I keep feeling I messed up, I was too strict, I know I was with food, I didn't do this, I did too much of this, High Fructose Corn Syrup, other b.s. crap people throw at you, and blah blah blabbety blah and I really need to CUT THAT $HIT OUT. He's a good kid, he'll work it out. Eventually.
In the meantime I'm thankful for booze and venting in blog posts like these!
I am enormously thankful for ALL-A-YOUS who read this nonsense, especially anyone and everyone who leaves comments, I love me some comments.